how to survive the mall

I only go to the mall in cases of emergency. Like Christmas.

As I strolled through the mall the other day, I came up with some ways to make my experience more enjoyable. And I will pass them on to you:

1. Look for couples who are 75 or older and are strolling along, holding hands. It will warm your heart.

2. Look for naked mannequins. They're there. It will make you smile. I saw one on the floor of The Bay, totally in pieces, sprawled everywhere. Did you know that the first fashion mannequins were made of papier mache in the mid-19th century in France? Little fun fact.

3. Sing along to a Christmas tune that's blaring.

4. Walk really slowly through the mall, like a Buddhist monk, just for kicks.

5. Tell a cashier that she has a beautiful smile and watch her light up.

6. Tell yourself: I have all the time in the world.

7. If you absolutely must take a child with you to the mall (this only occurs in emergency emergency situations at our house), then teach them these French words: j'aime ça. It means: I like/love that. Then they can point to their hearts' content. It sounds so much nicer than "can I have this? I want that. Mommy, please can I have that? Why not? I won't ask for anything else!"

8. Thank your lucky stars you're not with a toddler screaming in the Santa line.

glimpses of God

Something I love about this time of year is that the trees are so bare that you can see the nests. Squirrel nests, bird nests, wasp nests. Down every street, I spy on the trees seeing what secrets they're revealing.

Here's a beautiful glimpse of God:

Photo credit: Jeanette Seiling, Elora, Ontario

Jeanette writes: "Nests are a heart/soul image for me. At this Advent time, I reflect on how I can make a soft centre in my heart-nest where Christ can be born anew."

Wishing you a great 3rd week of Advent!

looking back; looking ahead

I was looking in my journal from this time last year. I wrote about my word for 2010 - what the year had meant to me, trying to summarize it in one word. I chose the word "dive" because we had spent 4 months of that year in France, and dove into a new experience. We also dove into an investigation into different kinds of community living and visited 2 ecovillages. A year of a lot of learning and exploring.

Then I tried to choose a word that would lead me into 2011 - prod me on. I couldn't choose one, so I chose two: simplify and connect.

I really like this exercise - of looking back, and looking forward. Of choosing one word to light my way.

So I'm doing it again this year. As 2011 wraps up, I can see how the words "simplify" and "connect" have led me in different ways this past year. I've been inspired to declutter over and over and over again (still not done), to try out blogging as a way of processing ideas and connecting with others, to welcome someone new into our family, and to get better at saying "no" so that I have time for the "yes" things that I really want to do. When I look back, I can see some movement and improvement in some areas where I was yearning for change last year at this time.

The word that keeps popping into my mind for 2012 (can't believe I'm even writing that number!) is: CHERISH. For me, this word has connections to family, friends, community and the earth, and also to the small moments and memories. It means slowing down, breathing evenly, practicing gratefulness, and looking at the world with a sense of wonder.

Some images that say "cherish" to me:

quilts on a clothesline

Eden and a ladybug
Photo credit: Open Shutters Photography

What about you?

What is your word for 2011? What word will light your way in 2012?

glimpses of God

me again. Still looking for small glimpses of God. Are you bored of this yet, or are you seeing some glimpses too?

Here's one glimpse from South Africa.

Karen Suderman writes:

"The mother walking ahead of us looked tired and slightly frazzled, as almost any mother of three would look by the end of the day. I can imagine this was their last stop before going home for the evening. Pick n' Pay, the local grocery store, is the last stop for many on their way home from a busy day. Gathering and herding her children along, her blond hair blowing in the breeze of incoming rain, the mother was working at making this a quick stop.


Coming in the opposite direction, having completed her shopping, was another mother of three. She too looked tired, eager to get home. However, she had encountered a problem. The grocery cart was stuck on a lip of the concrete. Her young daughter pulled with all her might on the front of the cart, her brow furrowed with strain. The mother pushed from the other side of the cart, but to no avail. It was stuck. 


The first mother moved towards the cart and helped the young girl lift it over the lip. It was a simple act. Almost insignificant. But the look of gratitude from the second mother indicated that it was anything but small. 


I love to see moments like this - people reaching out and lending a hand to each other. This incident in the context of South Africa was also significant. It was a white woman who helped a black woman. 


It is wonderful to see these small acts of compassion here. In a country that has such a brutal history of division and oppression along racial lines, it is wonderful to see how people are reaching out in small ways to begin to change that."

And a couple of photos from Karen in South Africa too:

Mpophomeni, South Africa

Zulu homestead, South Africa

Thank you, Karen!

Wishing all of you a wonderful second week of Advent!

a henna miracle

I'm trying to retrain my brain to notice the small miracles around me. Instead of seeing things as weird coincidences, I want to see them as God's gifts - as small miracles. Because once you start looking, this magic really is everywhere. When you have eyes to see.

I want to tell you about a small miracle that happened in our household this past week.

Our Afghan foster daughter, Shegofa, has obtained her refugee status. The next step is for her to get her permanent resident card. This costs $550.

Shegofa does amazing henna designs, so we decided to host a henna party as a fundraiser for her PR card. Some family and friends came - from age 5 to age 70 - and everyone donated as little or as much as they wished. There was no set amount. It was a fun evening.

Photo credit: Open Shutters Photography

Photo credit: Open Shutters Photography

Another friend from church wanted to have a party too, so she hosted one less than a week later. Another fun evening.


At the end of the 2nd party, Shegofa counted up the total money. It was $555.00 altogether. That's weird, we thought. How did the total come so close to the needed amount, with even a little to spare?

We sent my friend a message and she replied, "Isn't God amazing!?" And my tears flowed.

Here we were, in the midst of a small miracle. A magical gift of providence.

None of the women knew how much others were giving or how much still needed to be raised. Enough had been provided - with $5.00 to spare.

I am humbled to experience this, and am grateful that my eyes were opened to see this as God's gift.

Thanks be to God.

Advent calendar crazy

I think I have always loved Advent calendars - as a kid, as a youth, as an adult, and as a parent. And not just the chocolate variety. I love ones that have little messages - tasks or things to think about each day. And the playmobil ones - they're fun too.

Last week I made a calendar at my crafty friend's place. She hosted an Advent calendar evening with a bunch of friends. Here's the final product:

About 12 years ago - before kids - Derek and I made a calendar for my family members that had different activities for the "12 days of Christmas." It started on the 10th of December and went til the 25th, so I don't quite get why it was called "12 days." Oh well. We also made a tape (yes - a cassette tape) to go along with the calendar with some of our favourite Christmas tunes for family to listen to on certain days. It was very simple and fun. This was the inside/bottom of the calendar (there was another paper over top that had flaps on it to open each day):

I also saw an idea where you can use all of your single socks strung on a line with little notes or ornaments inside each day - 24 for the days leading up to Christmas. Luckily, I happen to have 24 lonely socks in the house just waiting for a special job like this:

I also thought of using those clips above (bought at IKEA years ago) to spell out a Christmas message - adding one letter for each day from Dec. 1st to 25th. Here's what I've come up with:

Hope, Joy, Peace, Love, Christmas [that's 25 letters!]

We've used this Advent calendar below (purchased at Ten Thousand Villages) for the past few years. Each day, there's a note inside the pocket. Three years ago, Zoe was convinced that it was God writing the notes. So sometimes they said, "Be nice to your parents today." or "Don't pick your nose anymore." 2 years ago, she thought it was Santa. Some mornings Santa would forget to put a note there, and he'd magically make one appear in the afternoon or even during supper. Last year, Zoe was convinced that she recognized our handwriting.

I like to be intentional about infusing this month with good things - something little each day - thoughts, prayers, activities that focus on the spirit of giving and what matters. It's easy to get caught up in the busyness of the season and not leave time for reflection or quiet or real meaning. For me, this time of year is all about family traditions - making memories together.

It's also about noticing small miracles and glimpses of God (are you seeing them too?). In her sermon on Sunday, my friend talked about trying to resist the urge to fill up her Advent calendar with lots of activities that will fill up time and space, leaving no room for surprises or God. I'd like to have both - meaningful activity and restful space to imagine, breathe, and take in the joy of the season.

If you're wanting to craft your own calendar this year, here are some ideas to draw from:

* Be a secret Santa or angel to someone today. Do a kind deed.
* Surprise a friend with a "just thinking of you" phone call.
* Make and drink homemade Bailey's.
* Listen to the Elvis Christmas album.
* Sing your favourite Christmas carol.
* Go for a walk with a loved one.
* Look at the lights around town.
* Write yourself a letter about what this year has meant to you.
* Read your favourite Christmas story.
* Pray for situations that seem hopeless.
* Tell of a time when you felt love.
* Talk about glimpses of God.
* Tell others at your supper table what they do to bring you joy.
* Light a candle. Pray a prayer of hope.
* Make a decoration for the Christmas tree.
* Write a Christmas card to someone far away.
* Host strangers.
* Go carolling.
* Make a Christmas show for friends or family.
* Bake some Christmas treats.
* Wrap a gift to donate to a children's hospital or agency that collects toys.
* Camp out in the basement.
* Write about your wishes for the world.
* Watch a favourite Christmas movie.
* Choose some favourite foods to give to the food bank.
* Clean and decorate your bedroom.
* Be impregnated by God's spirit (that was Derek's idea).

glimpses of God

Thank you for the glimpses of God that you've sent my way this week. It's been fun to receive them and to hear descriptions of them too.

For each of the following Mondays in December, I'll be posting more photos. So think/look through your files and send one my way!

Here are the photos from this past week:

Photo credit: Mara Bertelsen, Mirabeau, France

Gorgeous! This makes me want to live in Provence. This is what Mara wrote about this photo:

"The poppies blanket Provence almost overnight every May. One day you're doing something mundane like driving to the grocery store, you turn a corner, and there are fields of red as far as the eye can see. Poppies are whimsical little flowers - they don't last long, but they are hardy in that they are considered a weed and grow where few other things will - out of old stone walls, on piles of rubbish - and take over fields left fallow. Of course, the striking beauty of the poppy fields always makes me think of how they must have contrasted with the horror of Flanders Fields. For me, they are a glimpse of God each spring, reminding me that while there may be strife in the world, the poppies still return faithfully each year."

Photo credit: Carol Penner, Vineland, Ontario

Isn't this beautiful - the wind, the thin curtains billowing, the sunset, the light? The wind is filling up these curtains, but also passing through. Carol says that this photo reminds her of feeling free. I love how this helps us to see the wind.

Photo credit: Wendy Janzen, Kitchener, Ontario

Wendy took this photo of a monarch butterfly that "hatched" from its chrysalis at their house. Her son named the monarch "Coyote" and the experience of seeing a caterpillar transform into a chrysalis and then a butterfly was a wonderful glimpse of God. She took this photo when the butterfly was still inside the glass jar that had mesh netting on top. Here's what Wendy wrote: "One thing I like about this is the blurry perspective the glas creates - my glimpses of God are rarely crystal clear!" Beautiful. Brings back memories of our own butterfly experiences.

Photo credit: Daniel Listijabudi, Jogjakarta, Indonesia

Daniel took this photo of a "halo" around the sun. We called these rainbows "sun dogs" growing up, but I've never seen a full rainbow circle around the sun. Must have been amazing! I love the sunshine streaming in from the corner of this photo, and the light through the leaves.

Thank you!

simple Christmas wishes

We've had many conversations about Christmas wishes over the past few days. And I'm actually quite pleased with how they've gone. I'm all about encouraging simple wishes.

Here's a little look-back at some letters to Santa. This one's from Zoe to Santa 3 years ago.

Dear Santa, I want 3 things. A Barbie doll, Polly Pocket,
and Webkinz. I hope you are having a great day. Love Zoe

Two years ago, Zoe asked for an iPod Touch. Eden asked for a candy cane. Eden's request was granted; Zoe's was not. Mean parents.

My wish

Last year, Eden asked for a candy cane. Again - successful.

So this year, both Zoe and Eden have both asked for a candy cane. Eden added, "And I would also like one of those oranges that you can stick a straw into and drink out of." I have only had this kind of orange in Florida, so I've suggested to Derek that we consider going to Florida to grant this wish. But that just might be asking a bit too much. What was I talking about again? Oh yes - simple wishes.

These are the notes that Eden has written over the past few days:

Eden's note #1: To Santa Claus, I want a candy cane.

Eden's note #2 from this morning (she thought she should be more polite to Santa):
To Santa Claus, Can I have a candy cane for Christmas?

Last year Eden wanted to see Santa in the mall. She hopped up on his lap and he asked, "What would you like for Christmas?"

Eden: "A candy cane."

Santa: "Oh, I think you want more than just a CANDY CANE. How about a new doll?"

Eden: (nodding her head)

Really, Santa? What's wrong with just a candy cane? I told Derek about this, and he said, "Well, he does work for the mall, after all." But still. I was annoyed that he'd encourage this "more is better" idea in a 4 year old who had a simple wish.

So here's my letter to Santa this year:

Dear Santa Claus: You can do better. Honour the simple wishes. Love, Rebecca.