wonderfully made

When we took down the wasp nest in our front yard, we took the opportunity to examine it. We opened it up, waking up the wasps that were sleeping or hibernating.

It was amazing inside - like an apartment building with 4 different levels, all connected together. Each little hexagon inside, carefully and meticulously constructed. And then protected by this amazing paper in layer after layer around the whole building. We looked at it for quite some time, in awe.

It made me think about the detail in creation, and the detail in each of us. Incredible. How can I look at this construction, and see the tiny insect builders, and not believe in miracles? I can't.

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." Psalm 139:14

I'm dreaming of a stressless Christmas

At this time of year there are visions of sugar plums dancing through my head. And I start to get a bit antsy. And headache-y.

I long for a stressless Christmas - of a time of warmth and joy and giving and love. But the whole living in excess thing rears its ugly head around this time too, and I have to consciously think through my purchases. I want it to be a special time together as a family, but not a time that's focused on accumulating more stuff.

I've mentioned here my grandpa and his excitement over a plate filled with nuts, candy, and one orange. I long for this simplicity - this simple joy. But I get caught up in the trappings.

A friend of mine tries to have all of her holiday shopping done by the start of Advent. I think this is a great goal, but now that 1st day of Advent is only 6 days away. Is your holiday blood pressure rising just reading that? I love the idea of having the month of December for enjoying, soaking up all of the Christmas goodness - making food, but not rushing around the mall for gifts people don't need.

Another friend lets her boys - now 5, 8, and 10 - decide between a family experience or gifts. For the past several years, they've all agreed on a family experience, and no gifts. I love this idea too. They've gone to a special hotel that has an indoor waterpark.

Last year we went with our kids to see a production of Peter Pan and gave them a trunk filled with thrift store treasures to dress up and play Peter Pan at home. That trunk still gets pulled out, and the girls reminisce about the play.

I've really tried in past years to simplify for the holidays - expectations as well as gifts. I've tried to be done by the beginning of Advent, but I manage to sneak in more shopping during December because I don't think I've bought "enough". Because here's the thing: I do love to give. Whether it's bought stuff or handmade stuff, it is fun to give. But how much is too much, and how much is enough?

Here's my shopping plan for this Christmas. And I'll try to stick to it.

Derek and I are still deciding on a family experience for this year. Hopefully we'll know by December 24th. Besides that experience, this is the plan for our immediate family:

December: we plan to pack in lots of little things that have become traditions, like the outdoor Christmas pageant complete with real camel and donkey, our church's Christmas program, seeing the lights in Waterloo Park, putting out cookies for Santa and oats with glitter for the flying reindeer, reading little messages from our Advent calendar each day, and watching some holiday movies together.

December 24th: Open new pjs that are wrapped under tree. This has become somewhat of a tradition. New pjs for Christmas Eve.

December 25th: Open Christmas stocking, filled with some small gifts and goodies.

My shopping for our extended families will involve packing little hampers of comfort and joy. One year we had my siblings and parents over for meals - each couple for one meal. We let each couple choose Italian or Asian. The girls had prepared a dance routine for them as after-meal entertainment which was very entertaining. It was nice to visit with each family

SIBLINGS AND PARENTS: DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER PLEASE, OR RISK RUINING THE SURPRISE (which may turn out to be a surprise anyway if the elves don't get everything I dream of here finished in time for Christmas.)

Included in these happy hampers will be:

* homemade peppermint lip balm

* lavender wheat heating bags (I like the instructions here, but I'm not sewing a gecko shape - I'll just make big rectangles.)

* family photos that we had taken by my friend at Open Shutters Photography

* Fun Dip

* probably some good dark chocolate, possibly with sea salt or hot chili pepper

* homemade Bailey's Irish Cream

* and maybe some shortbread or jam-jam cookies if I'm so inspired

We'll plan a dance that the girls can perform, along with some songs on instruments or voices. And a homemade card for each.

I'd love to hear about your plans, if they can be shared. How do you enter this season?

glimpses of God

This year I wrote a Christmas play for our church called "Detectives of Divinity." I got the idea from a song written by Bryan Moyer Suderman. The chorus goes:

We are detectives of divinity,
we're looking all around
for signs of God's activity
wherever they are found.
God is up to something,
of that we can be sure.
So start the investigation!
The clues are everywhere.

It's a very fun song and it's been playing over and over at our house. I love this idea - that God is with us and active, and that there are little clues to be found everywhere. I gave the kids an assignment for the next month - to find these little clues and report back what they find.

So I've decided to do the same thing. Every Monday til the end of December (I think, but we'll see...) will be "glimpses of God" day on this here blog.

This past week, two people sent me photos of their glimpses of God. Here they are:

Photo credit: Sharon Bauman, St. Jacobs, Ontario

Isn't this leaf print incredible? I love seeing these on the sidewalks - such a sign of life, and a little bit mysterious looking too. A great clue.

Here's another:

Photo credit: Marcie Klassen, Vancouver, BC

I've tried photographing rainbows before, but it's tricky. Then add people + rainbow, and it's even trickier! It's so hard to capture all those colours. I love the light and dark in this photo. Can you see the excitement the boys are feeling?

If you're inclined to email me a photo of a glimpse of God, please do! I'd love to see the clues you're finding too. Start the investigation!

the zen of dishwashing

I can't even believe I just wrote that. Normally, dishwashing is anything but zen for me. It's something I avoid doing, and do just because the mess is driving me crazy.

Other times, I get a bit cranky and even shove the dishes around a little bit loudly just to show what a great job I'm doing of caring for my family by doing all of their dishes.

But lately, I've almost enjoyed doing the dishes. Almost. There's been something very relaxing about it - warm hands in a sink full of bubbles, methodically washing the cups then silverware then plates then pots. There's been no slamming of dishes. There's been almost a routine - what, Rebecca? A routine? - of washing dishes that happens AFTER THE MEAL instead of the next morning. This is revolutionary in our household. [Mom: this is not your fault; it's mine. You taught me well. I know I'm SUPPOSED to do the dishes right after the meal. I'm just lazy and would rather read and write.]

It really is calming when I let it be. My feet are planted, my hands stuck in water, moving through the dishes as my mind wanders. And it can wander in a more peaceful way than when my body is wandering around the house trying to do too much.

I love the look of clean counters. And I've noticed that washing dishes can make my crappy moods go away. It's magic! Instead of going to bed feeling crappy because the dishes aren't done, I don't! Instead of waking up and feeling crappy because the dishes aren't done, I don't! It really is remarkable what wonderful feelings can come from a clean house. Many wise people have known this before me; I'm just a bit slow I guess.

I even have pretty, colourful rocks that are on the windowsill by the kitchen sink. So I can look at them and try to believe that I'm getting some kind of good energy from them. Spending $3.00 on these at the market seemed like a good investment in a cleaner kitchen. Whatever works, right?

Wishing you a weekend of zen dishwashing. :)

home sweet home

This wasp nest has been hanging in the tree in our front yard for the summer. It's only obvious in the fall when the leaves start leaving the tree. It's huge - a bit bigger than a basketball.

The really weird thing about this nest is that 2 years ago, wasps built a nest in this exact tree, in this exact spot. We cut off the branch that held that nest. Last year there was no nest. But this year - there it was again.

It must be a good spot. It reminded me of the kids' book: The Best Nest, where 2 birds go in search of their dream home, only to come back to the exact place that they started. These wasps have obviously found a place that they like - that's the perfect mix of warmth and protection - and they return.

We took this nest down yesterday because Eden wanted to have a good look at it. We opened it up and looked inside. It was amazing. There were different levels - kind of like an apartment building - incredibly intricately built.

And it made me think about having a place of our own that's the perfect mix of warmth and protection. Our house is fine, but we dream of something else. Something that feels a little more permanent. But our criteria for this house feels so overwhelming sometimes that I don't even want to start looking. I would like a dreamy home (not a dream home - that feels like too huge of a task) where we all feel like returning to.

But then I think of our Afghan foster daughter - who moved so many times even within Kabul that she can't quite remember - and this feels selfish, this dreamy home dream. Why can't I be satisfied? Is this part of my more-more-more problem?

I grew up in the same house since I was 2 - the farm where my parents still live. I have a very permanent view of home. My husband moved around a lot, so he can look at a lot of options without feeling attached.

We moved here 5.5 years ago, and we kind of saw this as a 5 year house. But now it's hard to decide what's next. Living in community - ecovillage style - was something that has appealed to us, and we visited 2 ecovillages to spy out the possibilities. Being there, though, made us realize it might not be quite what we're after. A bit too intense and too many meetings. But the community part of it was appealing. And then there's the urban/suburban/country question. Where is the best nest for our family?

I wish I could be like the wasps. Happy with a sun-drenched branch on a quiet street.

generous with my excess

In September and October I led a Sunday school class on the book of Amos. Not a book I had ever read before, and if I would have, I probably would have stopped, put it down, said "I don't need to read this kind of crap," and moved on.

But this time I took it seriously. And it's amazing what I learned. Amos is talking to the rich, telling them to stop being so complacent and to stop ignoring the poor and to do justice. One of the most striking passages is in Amos 5:21-24 (The Message version) where God, speaking through Amos, rails on the Israelites for their worship without justice:

I can't stand your religious meetings. 
I'm fed up with your conferences and conventions. 
I want nothing to do with your religion projects,
your pretentious slogans and goals.
I'm sick of your fund-raising schemes, 
your public relations and image making.
I've had all I can take of your noisy ego-music.
When was the last time you sang to me?
Do you know what I want?
I want justice--oceans of it.
I want fairness--rivers of it.
That's what I want. That's all I want.

That last verse is perhaps more recognizable as "But let justice roll down like waters, and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream." Anyway, interesting passage. Lots to chew on.

In one class, we talked about our generosity - in particular to the poor. At this time of year, many charitable organizations send out appeals for our money. In this class that I mentioned above, one person said, "I think of myself as a generous person. But I'm generous with my excess."

This stuck with me. I thought about how sometimes I look around our cupboards for donations for the food bank thinking "what could we do without until our next shopping trip?" Stupid. And selfish. I also thought about how I do justice at an arms-length. I give to organizations or to the food bank, but this is indirectly helping the poor. There are not a lot of encounters that I have in suburban Waterloo with the poor.

So this study was a challenge for me to get out of my comfort zone. To directly interact with "the poor." To do justice. To give not just out of my excess. I'm not sure what this means, but that's what's on my mind today.

glimpses of God

Look for God in unexpected places...

You just might even see a johnny jump-up blooming in late fall.

imagine peace

As November 11th approached, we've had quite a few discussions about poppies in our household - about their symbolism, history, and meaning today.

Remembrance Day often leaves me with funny feelings. But maybe that's the whole point.

Many of us have connections to wars, either past or present. My paternal grandfather was a cook in the navy in World War II. And we're hosting an Afghan teenager whose mother doesn't know life in Afghanistan without war. For 39 years, that's all she's known.

Both of my daughters are planning to wear red "to remember is to work for peace" buttons today instead of poppies. They've seen them around our Mennonite circles over the years, and asked if they could wear one this year.

I'm all for remembering. Remembering is what helps us live today - remembering war can help us work for a world with no war. But why the outdoor gun salutes at the cenotaphs? What does that even mean to have guns going off while we're trying to imagine a world without war? Do we need that auditory reminder?

I remember seeing the movie "Saving Private Ryan" when I was in university. I cried and cried after watching it. I knew that I didn't need to watch that movie to know that war is awful, even evil.

I want my kids' imaginations to be stirred by a vision for peace. A vision that does not give in to war as a solution, but strives for something more. This is what I want our schools to do - to stir up peace.

And imagine... if the money that is poured into military budgets around the world were poured into creative peacemaking efforts instead... just imagine!

Imagine a world without war. Imagine peace.

My brother-in-law Bryan Moyer Suderman wrote a song this summer with this chorus:

"There's a new world coming,
it's already here,
there's a new world on its way
There's a new world coming, 
it's already here,
let's begin to live that way."

A world where "the wolf shall live with the lamb," where "the cow and the bear shall graze" and where "a little child shall lead them."

At 11:00 today, I will pause to imagine this world. Will you join me?