Has it been almost a month since I last wrote? Yikes. Well, it's all part of my campaign to be not so super. This is a very fun campaign, and it goes along with my "expect less" motto. It leads to a lot less guilt and a lot more appointment (opposite of disappointment). :)
It involves letting things go, or at least slide, for awhile. Letting balls drop. Not picking them up (someone else can). Stop trying to prove myself to myself. Sitting in my pajamas for the day. Being terribly unproductive. Releasing my self-appointed role as emotional barometer of the family. Enabling responsibility, not helplessness, in my children. Breathing. Praying. Smiling.
Along with being not so super, I'm trying to be not so jealous of my husband who's spending 3.5 weeks in Israel/Palestine right now. But the unexpected gift that I always find when I single-parent is that I lower my expectations for what will get accomplished around here. And I spend more time just being present. Presence. Stillness. Now why can't I just be like that when we're all on the same national soil? Silly.
I have no problem expecting more of myself - I do this all the time. More mom, more wife, more blogging, more working, more church/volunteer work. If I have a 3/4 time job (which I just started 2 weeks ago), then I'll work 5/4.
What is much harder for me is the less.